Men have a win/lose philosophy in love. In this relationship, they care about women as much as themselves. When his heart is open, he feels so confident in himself that he is capable of making changes. If she gives an opportunity to prove his potential, he expresses his best self. To experience fulfilment he must begin to live his life motivated by love. If he feels that he cannot succeed then he regresses back to his old selfish ways. He wants to use his power and skills in the service of others, especially in service of the woman whom he likes. In that situation, there is beginning to develop a new philosophy, a win/win philosophy. He wants a world where everyone cared for themselves as well as for others.
Most of the men are not only hungry to give love but they are starving for it as well. When his relationship fail he finds himself depressed and stuck in alone. He stops caring and doesn’t know why he is so depressed. It is difficult to be motivated when he is not needed. To make him motivated again, he needs to appreciated, trusted and accepted. If he does not motivate then he start kill himself slowly, in other words, it is a slow death for a man. He starts drink, smoke and get involved in fight or unnecessary argument. I can remember, I was nearly to fight with one guy in Mall last week. I started smoking heavily again (I am regretting and punishing myself). Neither, I like anything nor I care anything nowadays (stopped talking with most of the friends because they may tell something which can hurt me more). Sometime I think to go far away from this city but I don’t know where I can get peace.
Generally, Men and Women have different emotional needs. Typically, Men give in relationship what he wants and Women give what she wants. Women instinctively appreciate the little things. The only exceptions are when a woman doesn’t realize a man needs to hear appreciation. When a woman feels unloved and neglected it is hard for her automatically to appreciate what a man does do for her. She feels resentful because she has given so much more than he has. This resentment blocks her ability to appreciate the little things. I can remember, when I told her I quit smoking and was excepting to hear her appreciation but she didn’t tell me except how are you feeling now? Did you find hard to quit? I was thinking she might become happy that I quit smoking because she just told me once which can make her feel that I really care a lot. Sometime, both Men and Women think they give and give but do not get back which can feel their love is unacknowledged and unappreciated. Most of the Men strive for greater and greater success because they believe it will make them worthy of love. I have noted few of the points which are taken from the book about women and men expect from each other.
A men’s deepest fear is that he is not good enough or that he is incompetent. He compensates for this fear by focusing on increasing his power and competence. Success, achievement and efficiency are far most in his life. A man appears most uncaring when he is afraid. Just women are afraid of receiving, man are afraid of giving. To extend himself in giving to others means to risk failure, correction, and disapproval. These consequences are most painful because deep inside his unconscious he holds an incorrect belief that he is not good enough. This belief was formed and reinforced in childhood ever time he thought he was expected to do better. When his accomplishments went unnoticed or were unappreciated, deep in his unconscious he began forming the incorrect belief that he was not good enough.
Just as women are sensitive to feeling rejected when they don’t get attention they needed, men are sensitive to feeling that they failed when a women talks about problems. This is why it is so hard for him to listen sometimes. He wants to be her hero. When she is disappointed or unhappy over anything, he feels like a failure. Her unhappiness confirms his deepest fear: he is just not good enough. Many women today don’t realize how vulnerable men are and how much they need love too. Love helps him to know that he is enough to fulfil others.
At last but not the least, my comment with her became enigmatic so I could not fathom what should I name it? Unfortunately, I am fatigued with everything and want to cry on her arm like small kid.
Most of the men are not only hungry to give love but they are starving for it as well. When his relationship fail he finds himself depressed and stuck in alone. He stops caring and doesn’t know why he is so depressed. It is difficult to be motivated when he is not needed. To make him motivated again, he needs to appreciated, trusted and accepted. If he does not motivate then he start kill himself slowly, in other words, it is a slow death for a man. He starts drink, smoke and get involved in fight or unnecessary argument. I can remember, I was nearly to fight with one guy in Mall last week. I started smoking heavily again (I am regretting and punishing myself). Neither, I like anything nor I care anything nowadays (stopped talking with most of the friends because they may tell something which can hurt me more). Sometime I think to go far away from this city but I don’t know where I can get peace.
Generally, Men and Women have different emotional needs. Typically, Men give in relationship what he wants and Women give what she wants. Women instinctively appreciate the little things. The only exceptions are when a woman doesn’t realize a man needs to hear appreciation. When a woman feels unloved and neglected it is hard for her automatically to appreciate what a man does do for her. She feels resentful because she has given so much more than he has. This resentment blocks her ability to appreciate the little things. I can remember, when I told her I quit smoking and was excepting to hear her appreciation but she didn’t tell me except how are you feeling now? Did you find hard to quit? I was thinking she might become happy that I quit smoking because she just told me once which can make her feel that I really care a lot. Sometime, both Men and Women think they give and give but do not get back which can feel their love is unacknowledged and unappreciated. Most of the Men strive for greater and greater success because they believe it will make them worthy of love. I have noted few of the points which are taken from the book about women and men expect from each other.
A men’s deepest fear is that he is not good enough or that he is incompetent. He compensates for this fear by focusing on increasing his power and competence. Success, achievement and efficiency are far most in his life. A man appears most uncaring when he is afraid. Just women are afraid of receiving, man are afraid of giving. To extend himself in giving to others means to risk failure, correction, and disapproval. These consequences are most painful because deep inside his unconscious he holds an incorrect belief that he is not good enough. This belief was formed and reinforced in childhood ever time he thought he was expected to do better. When his accomplishments went unnoticed or were unappreciated, deep in his unconscious he began forming the incorrect belief that he was not good enough.Just as women are sensitive to feeling rejected when they don’t get attention they needed, men are sensitive to feeling that they failed when a women talks about problems. This is why it is so hard for him to listen sometimes. He wants to be her hero. When she is disappointed or unhappy over anything, he feels like a failure. Her unhappiness confirms his deepest fear: he is just not good enough. Many women today don’t realize how vulnerable men are and how much they need love too. Love helps him to know that he is enough to fulfil others.
At last but not the least, my comment with her became enigmatic so I could not fathom what should I name it? Unfortunately, I am fatigued with everything and want to cry on her arm like small kid.
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